Frustration overload

My frustration levels are at an all time high, I feel the effects of no control and am ready to scream… This about sums up my current mood, if I twittered I would have posted it, and most likely received responses from friends and people I don’t know offering me words of wisdom I don’t want. But as it is I do blog, and so I will post my frustrations here, but unlike twitter I can express myself with a few more words, I will not be limited, my power to say as much or as little as I like is not taken away from me on my blog.

This over all feeling stems from the fact that power, my ability to make my own choice has been taken away from me. I am being forced to do something that I do not wish to do.

I think as humans we cherish our freewill, we consider it to be one of the most important aspects of our lives. I know I do… The ability to make up my own mind, to chose what I want or don’t want is, to me, the most important freedom I enjoy. All other freedoms stem from this one. Freewill is the mother of all others…

If I do not have the freedom of Freewill, than I could not choose to believe or not believe in God, with out freewill I could not choose to remain faithful or not, nor would I have the freedom to decide what kind of life I choose to live.

When we perceive our freewill is under attack we react, we fight back, if we can. The current problem is I have no ability to fight back, I have no freedom from this decision, and that weighs heavy on me.

The idea that I can not control the situation, the fact that I am being made to feel helpless is a very taxing idea, real or not, it is all the same. Since freewill is not a tangible object, not something that Wal-Mart sell, we are left with only or “feelings” and “perceptions” of what freewill is or does. To me, it is the essence of all other freedoms, it is the greatest of gifts from God and it is the very being of our humanhood. To have this freedom striped away from me, to have my ability to exercise it or not trampled on is a travesty.

In our current society we see this happen all the time and we see the effects of it in our everyday life. For me it is the fact that as part of my bankruptcy I must turn in my current vehicle and purchase a new vehicle with very limited funds (like I said I am in bankruptcy). The fact that the courts do not seem to care, that they seem to make it almost easer to just walk away is in it self a shame, but that’s another blog. The simple fact that I am being forced in to a situation that does not serve me and my interest the best, the simple fact that they have taken away my ability to use my freewill is dehumanizing. And before any of you start saying, “Well what did you expect, your in bankruptcy, it was your own bad choices that got you there in the first place”, all I can say is Yes I know, and You have no idea why I am in my current situation… My complainant is not about bankruptcy, but rather about the dehumanization of the process.

Example:

I my case I have to get rid of the current vehicle, it’s lease runs out in September, but the courts want me to return it now, fair enough. To be able to continue to work I need a dependable car, so I looked in to a  Kia, and inexpensive vehicle with a warranty. With the credit market tight, and the fact that I am in bankruptcy the payment would have been over $400 per mount, about what I am paying for my current lease. I asked for a used car, or the cheapest payment, but the condition of the bank would not allow it. I looked at a Ford dealership, won’t even consider me. So my options are limited.

So in-order to make the payments on the new vehicle my payments to the courts has to go down, logical I would say. Well the courts don’t seem to think so, in fact they won’t even allow me to skip a payment to have the down payment needed to get the new vehicle I need to get to work.

My lawyer than recommends that I just turn in the current, skip this payment and purchase a used vehicle with the whole $2000.00 I have. Here is the problem:

1. Not many reliable vehicles for that kind of money

2. By skipping my payment the courts can decide to toss out my case, leaving me holding the bag

3. I have a total breakdown due to the fact the our court system is (insert bad word here) up!

 

So, and I started off this blog, I and extremely frustrated, and ready to blow! I woke up at 3am this morning and was wide awake until 4, dozed in and out until 5:30 when my alarm went off… My 3am wake up call was a good time for me to practice my deep breathing skills and to say a few prayers to a select few saints… It will all work out, of this I am certain, like I have sated in this blog, we must have a positive attitude for a positive end result.

 

 

Paul

King of Pop

Yesterday, I will admit it, I watched the services for the King of Pop… I had to see it for myself, and all in all , it was well done. But it does bring up some questions that we as a society must answer.

The media and fans and even some nonfans have turned Michael Jackson in to a saint a world peace maker a ambassador for race relations, and well the truth be told he was a troubled man with many issues.

I too think that he was a very gifted and multi talented person, and I agree that he brought happiness to the world through his gift. And yes he should be praised for this, but the out pouring of grief for this man, whom most of us did not know on a personal level is, well jest just say its a tad bit overboard.

King of Pop or not, Mr. Jackson had issues to deal with. In the limelight or not, he is human and should be held to the same standard as all others are help too. It seems that we often times forgive the sins of the famous with all to much ease. Lets look at a few of his:

• Accused of child molestation
• Drug use
• Self hatred

I do not list them to be disrespectful, but to point out that MJ was not a saint, as most of us are not. That we must be willing to accept him as a whole being. He was not a monster as some would like to make him to be, but nor is he a saint as others would like us to believe, but what he was, was human, like all of us are.

To counter balance the short list of his sins, lets look at his humanity, he was:

• A Son
• A Brother
• An Uncle
• A friend
• A Child of God’s
• An Entertainer like no other
• Listed in the Gunnies book of world records for the Pop Star to give the most to charity
• and lets us not for get a Father

To be fair to him we need to list all his traits, good and bad, but we mustalways keep in mind that he, like us all, was human. Mr. Jackson was a frail little boy locked up in a mans body, the issues run deep with in his soul and in some ways we all have a little responsibility for this, we as fans place him up high, create a god of him than we abandon him in his hour of need, we play to his vulnerabilities to fulfill our needs, leaving him empty and spent. We treat our stats as our own personal play things and disregard them when we are done with them. Mr. Jackson, like all of us was given the gift of free will, he chose to do the drugs and other acts of self pity and hatred, but lest us not forget that we all, in someway, enabled him to do so.

You may not be a Jackson fan, so you may be saying, “Not Me”, but I would say to that, “Yes You” because if you did not do it for Mr. Jackson you did it for some other star. Indirectly we all all played a roll in this, in someway we all enabled him, in some way we all can take a small bit of reasonability for his demise just like in some way we all can take a bit of responsibility for his rise to stardom.

 

RIP Michael… May God Bless your soul…

Paul

The Power of Humility

It has been some time for me to write an original blog for You Can Be new, I have either posted the same blog to both of my sites or just not posted. Well today that will stop, I will post once again an original thought….

I have been extremely busy as of late, with the release of my companies product and with my 9 to 5 job… But I will make time, either at night or in the morning to post. I know that no one depends on my post for there life, that they can survive a day with out reading what I have to say, in fact I would say some people as most likely happy I stopped posting. But I will go back to a statement I made early on in this blog, I blog for me, know one else.  It is for my benefit that I spend the time blogging, it helps me hone in my skills, fine tune my opinions and in someway allows me the small feeling of being part of something larger than myself. 

We all need to belong to something that is larger than ourselves, we all need to know and understand that we are not the center of the universe that we are not the alpha and omega but rather we are just one small part of the over all.

Humility is a strong and powerful ally to have. He who is humble is truly at peace with themselves. The humility to admit that you are not the center of the world, to admit that your are nothing but one piece of the over all puzzle will place you in the position of power.

Now I am sure most of you are scratching your head at this very moment asking yourself, How can be humble place me in a position of power? Well good question, and I am glad you asked…

Humility allows you, the humble one, to remove yourself from the moment, allowing you to see the events that are taking place as they truly are, and not as you wish to see them as to benefit you.

Read read that one more time, make sure you grasp that concept… I’ll wait…

Ok, good, now that you have read it once more, lets look at it again.

If I am truly humble, than in any given situation I will not place myself at the center of events, but to remain humble I would remove myself and my concerns for self from the event and look at the concerns of others. If I am not the center of the universe, the do all and end all or the alpha and omega than I no longer need to concern myself with how I would feel or look or whatever, by true concern would be for the others involved, and there are always others.

If I except the fact that I am but one small part of the over all, and I am humble than my concern turns to the other small parts of the over all.

Just think about that for a few seconds, the possibilities of it. By humbling ourselves we have allowed ourselves to be used for the greater good, and in doing so, we have shown ourselves to be leaders, thus gaining great power over ourselves and others.

The irony of it all is this, we have gained great power, but as a humble being we will never use it to advance our own personal agenda. A truly humble person has the ability to change the world.

• Jesus
• Gandhi
• Fr. Solanus Casey
• Mother Teresa

All are examples of great humility, and all have changed the world, some to greater effects than others, but change the world they did.

Humility is a powerful thing, and one that can not be missed used, by it’s very nature, one can not be humble and full of themselves, one can not be humble yet seek to harm others, one can not be humble and see only themselves. To truly be humble one has to truly deny themselves to themselves. One can not serve self and others at the same time, as Jesus said, One can not serve to masters…

I strive for this perfect humility, I fail more than i achieve, but i continue to strive.

Paul

The Challenge

Well I told you that I was working hard to launch the STATIC Program, and as you can see by the press release I posted, The STATIC Portal is launched. Now I would love to say I have had hundreds of churches sign up, but that would be a lie, and I would love to say that my email have been flooded with request for more information, but that would be a lie, but what I can say is, I have launched what I consider to be a very well thought out and produced faith formation program. One that truly challenges the youth to new levels of faith, not only the youth, but also the teacher. The STATIC Program is one program with many faces. It is, in a way, a traditional class room (well not really), but it is much, much more. The STATIC Program challenges all who participate to in the program, the youth, the teachers, ministers and parents, all are challenged to examine there faith. We ask them to open up there minds and hearts and to allow there souls the ability to breath, to take in the Holy Spirit. STATIC allows for this growth, encouraging  it and fostering it. Like no other program, STAITC truly challenges the participants to examine there faith to grow in there faith and to learn and discover there faith.

Now the question is, what do we do as adults to do the same? How do we challenge our faith, how do we grow in our faith? What action do we take, what steps to deepening our faith are we currently one?  We, as Catholics, are called to learn more, to deep out faith and to always be ready and able to defend out fait, can you? Are you ready to defend your faith? Are you studying more, reading more, attending more and being more? Are you fulfilling your calling to the faith?

I would say no, most of us are not, I know I could be doing more, we all could be. But as a youth I was never challenged to own my faith, my options and    questions were never of value to others with in the faith, I as a youth truly had no opinion. STATIC is trying to change that, we are challenging the concept of youth should be seen and not heard, and sadly in some churches they should not be seen nor heard. Sad as that may sound. But I was always one who questioned, I wanted to know more, I have always had a love for my faith and because of that love, I have always wanted to know more. So I developing this program, I have had to studied and learn more, to dig deeper in to the faith.

The youth are a vibrant part of our community, they give us life and add a layer of light heartedness, they are part of the body of Christ, they are the very children Christ himself called to him, remember Jesus tells us that we must be like children to enter in to the kingdom of God.

We read this passage and forget it as fast as we read it. It does not fit in to our world view of youth, it flows counter to our culture. But wasn’t that just like Jesus, to challenge us to be more, do more and live a fuller life in Him.  But ain’t that just like humans to pick and choose what part of the teachings of Jesus we want to follow, believe in and take deep in our hearts.

The youth of our parishes are the life line and the blood of our faith community. Yet we all to often choose to push them to the side, to ignore them. All to often the youth are seen as the clean up crew, but we at STATIC see them as much more. We see them as active, vibrant and essential to the faith life of our faith life. We view the youth as not the clean up crew but as part of the over all parish life.

So, even though I can not say that the STATIC site has been overwhelmed with hits, and churches are just clamoring to sigh up, but they are not, but I also know that they will, in time they will sigh up, when they decide that the youth are important to them, they will sign up, I know…

So this is the challenge I face, how do I show the Church the value of youth, and of the STATIC Program?

Paul

STATIC Solutions Portal is released

 

STATIC Solutions, LLC a leader in middle school faith formation just released it’s on line Portal server, giving unprecedented access to faith formation material to parish educators at unbelievable prices and quality. 

Westland, Michigan (PRWEB) 01, July, 2009 –

STATIC Solutions, LLC a leader in middle school faith formation just released it’s on line Portal server, giving unprecedented access to faith formation material to parishes, home schooled and youth ministers. The STATIC Portal is a web based solution for your parish educational needs, giving total control to you and your parish staff for a reasonable yearly fee.

With the STATIC Portal ™ you will be able to download and print the documents you need when you need them. With continual updates to the Portal, you will always find something new and interesting to use, to help supplement your educational programs, or to replace your existing program with the STATIC Youth ™ program.

The STATIC Youth ™ program is a three year Confirmation preparation program designed to engage the youth in the learning process. The STATIC Youth ™ program uses interactive educational models to draw the youth in to the learning process, and at the same time imparting valuable Catholic principles as they take their faith walk towards conformation.

STATIC Youth ™ is a designed as a 6^th through 8^th grade program, with an alternating theme of small group (class room) and large group (youth group) sessions. Each session, large or small group, is designed to actively involve the youth and leaders in the process of discovery.

The STATIC Program can also be used as supplemental material for parishes choosing the “whole community” educational model. With 12 different topics to choose from, ranging from Exodus to Christian Service, there is bound to be something that fits your parish needs.

The Home Schooling community will also find the STATIC Portal ™ a useful and relevant tool for their educational and faith needs. STATIC Solutions faith based material can easily be adapted for home schooling needs, or can be used for “group” sessions with other home schooling youth in your area.

The possibilities are endless for the parish, schools or home schooled. With the ability to mix and match to create your own unique program, or by following our tested and proven program, STATIC offers you the control you need and the strong Catholic education materials you desire.

STATIC Portal ™ is a yearly subscription site that allows reproduction rights to all its copy-written material for one year. We, at STATIC Solutions, pride ourselves on delivering relevant programming that is faithful to the teachings of the Catholic Church.

For more information on the STATIC Youth ™ program and the STATIC Portal ™ please visit www.staticplace.com

 

About STATIC Solutions, LLC:
STATIC Solutions, LLC. is a dynamic educational organization dedicated to forging lasting relationships between children, their families, and Christ.  The name stands for Students Taking Action Together in Christ, located in Westland, Michigan. STATIC Solutions has developed fun and interactive Catholic/Christian-based curriculum for young adults in sixth through eighth grade as well as those in youth groups and Sunday school programs.  STATIC Solutions combines activity-based games with high-impact educational lessons that inspire kids to take ownership of their faith.  STATIC Solutions will provide local and national church organizations with subscriptions to this unique and in-demand curriculum.

 

Contact:
Paul Sposite, owner
STATIC Solutions, LLC
734-748-3771
http://www.staticplace.com

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Update and ME Time

I haven’t posted much as of late, it’s been kind of crazy for me, with TONS of stuff to do prior to July 1, but soon, very soon it should calm down for me. Launching a new company and product is very time consuming, but well worth it (I hope!). Setting up the web sites (www.staticplace.com) creating the marketing campaign and designing all the necessary documents, they all take time and effort. And with working a fulltime 9 to 5 type job, I don’t always have time to blog, nor time to do much of anything else.

But I always find “me” time, I always find time to relax and unwind. Yesterday was such a day for me, after work I went home and didn’t take my laptop out all night, I read, watched a little TV and didn’t even think about all the work I still have to do… But today, well most likely a little bit like yesterday. I am to the point were my mind needs to stop thinking about all that I have to do, and I need to rest it up, just a day or 2 and than back to the grind.

I still need to create samples of the program, and finish the websites and place ads in papers and find a sales person or 2 and and and… The list seems to keep adding to itself, seems like every time I think I am done, a new action item is added to the list, but that’s OK, because I know that in the long run it will all be worth the effort. So for today and the next few days I will work work work….

So I just wanted to catch you up a bit on what is going on with me, until next time, make sure you always have a little “ME” time in your week, it’s important to your health, both mentally and physically. I have written on that before, and maybe I will write a little more about it next time…

Paul

Responsibility, what happen to it?

What ever happen to  the concept of responsibility? It seems we have lost that somewhere along the way to enlightenment. As we grab onto those lofty ideas of inner growth and walk down the path of opening our minds, we seem to forget that we have an obligation to self, that we are responsible for our own actions.

In the modern world, all-to-often we hear people state “Not my fault”, “I didn’t know” or even “But, I wanted too” or something along those lines. the basic underling theme of each of them is the same, the lack of personal responsibility.

And the sickening part of it all is that we as a culture now think this is an appropriate response. We now expect and accept the concept that it was out of our control, that we had nothing to do with it, that a great force overtook us and we could not stop it, we were at it’s mercy, that we are the victims (because everyone loves being the victim).

My 17 year old nephew is a perfect example, or for that matter, any teen will prove the point. Ask a very direct question, such as did you_(fill in the blank)_? and 9 times out of 10 you will get the response of an excuse, a reason why they did not.  The question required a simple yes or no, nothing more nothing less, but what you get is reasons why they had no control over the situation. Now you may be saying, well that’s just teens, they all do that… And I will respond by saying, Yes you are correct they all do do it, and that’s my point! We, the adults, allow them to, because we, the adults, accept that, we nurture it in them. If we, the adults, did not allow it, than they, the teens, would not do it. Example, when my nephew, or any other teen, responds to a simple yes or no question my response is “That’s not what I asked you”. I didn’t ask for the six million reasons why the dishes are still in the sink, or why you lost your phone or anything else, what I asked was “Did you _____?”. Simple question requiring a simple response. And the funny thing is, he now knows (for the most part) that he needs to respond to the question, and not play the victim of his own lack of responsibility, in fact, the scary part of all this is, that most youth I deal with learn this lesson rather quickly from me, because I do not allow them to skip over personal responsibility when they are responding or talking to me.

But as long as we, the adults, allow them to continue placing the blame elsewhere, as long as we accept and expect them to do so, they will continue to do so. But, and this is a big but, we must also take stock in our own lack of personal responsibility. We as adults do the same exact thing, I wave worked with and still do work with many who never take the blame, the blame is always place on someone or something else. I have the same exact conversations that I have with my nephew with adults, ask a yes or no questions get a five minute dissertation on why they did not or could not or would not, but the same theme runs through it all, it is never, under any circumstances there fault. Funny how that works, with so many perfect adults in the world one must wonder how we ever got so screwed up.

The challenge before us is one of paramount responsibility, in a world were the Nanny State is on the rise, and were the populous wants and expects the government to take care of them from birth to death we are entering in to a world of no responsibility. We are entering a unprecedented time in American History, it is a defining moment for us, as our President (Mr. Obama) likes to keep telling us, and he is correct! The defining moment is now, and it is all about responsibility, our own personal responsibility. We have to decide if we want to keep passing our responsibility to the government or do we want to keep it for ourselves. Do we want to be truly free (keeping our own personal responsibility) or do we want to be slaves (giving all our responsibility to the government).

Personal responsibility is walking towards a slow death, so far it has been an uphill walk, but we are now at the top of the hill, and what we choose to do at this moment in our history will determine the direction and speed of our walk. If we choose to continue to negate our personal responsibilities we will run, not walk down the back side of the hill in to slavery to the government, but if we choose at this pivotal time in our history to turn back towards they way we came from, if we choose to re-accept our personal responsibilities, that we can start our slow, responsible walk back down the front side of the hill towards our personal freedoms once again.

We have a choice to make, it is our responsibility to make the correct choice, not only for our today’s but also for our children’s children’s tomorrows.

Paul

Lost in the day

Well it happens, every now and than days come along that just allow you to rest, to refuel, and that’s what Sunday was for me, a day to rest. Saturday I was up early and spent the morning at a conference, than Saturday afternoon I puttzed on the computer and around the house, didn’t do much, but never felt relaxed. But Sunday, after church I found that grove, the one that allows you to relax and to enjoy the day just as it is. So that’s what I did. I say by my pond, read some newspapers, finished a book and read some other books I have going (I like to read 3 or 4 books at one time).

It was a perfect day in all regards here in Michigan, the sun was out there was a slight breeze and a calm in the air that held me captive. It was a wonderful thing! It was a day that allowed you to get lost in it, no that’s not it, allowed doesn’t really give the day justice, it was more of a beckoning kind of day.This day beckoned me, called to my soul and begged me to get lost in her rays of sunshine and her cool breeze that tantalized me and engulfed me.

Days like that are perfection, they allow the soul to rest in the perfection of nature and in the kindness of God. The resting of the soul is paramount to a body in harmony with creation and the creator, it is this harmony that allows the creative process to flow.

The ability to get lost in the day is the ability to allow the natural energy of creation to take over, to fill you with the radiance of God and His loving and healing embrace. This ability is a natural ability, but modern man, in all his greatness, has lost this ability. It is now an ability that is lost, one that use to come natural now needs to be taught.

As we have created a more productive society, we have also created a more detached society. Detached from family, from each other and our neighbors. But more importantly we are detached from creation, and from the creator, God himself. This detached state draws energy from us, causing us to wear our, for our souls to get exhausted and for us to become less than what we are. The ability to rest in the Lord is the ability to find peace of soul.

Often times we are told that we must find peace of mind, to allow our minds to gather energy and rest, to place behind us the unpleasant realities of the modern world. Well I would challenge you that it’s not peace of mind that we need, but more likely peace of soul. We need to once again connect with the Lord on a level of intimacy that is currently unknown to us. We need to allow the Spirit of God to consume us, to fill us and to over flow from with in us.

The quiet of the heart leads to the pleasure of the soul…

Paul

Frustrations!

Frustration is a very powerful emotion and one that can wipe you out. I know, I have been dealing with a lot of it as of late. The frustration of trying to do what is right, the frustration of dealing with people who do not act or react they way you expect them too or the way you need them too. Frustration over just being frustrated.  It’s a never ending stream of energy that seems to just slap the living @#$%# out of me, and too tell you the truth, I am ready for it to just all end.

Last night I was exhausted, the night before the same thing, and the same with the night prior to that one. I can’t remember what day it was, but it was last week, on my way home from work, stopped at a red light, I dozed off, kinda scary stuff. Now understand I am in bed by 10pm most nights, never later that 11pm ad up at 6am, work until 3pm. So it’s not like I am burning the candle at both ends, it’s just he stress and frustration of my life at this very moment.

So what can I do, how can I cope… Easy, I just do, I allow myself time to vent, I allow my self time to just think. For example last night I need a gallon of milk so I walked to the local store, leaving the car in the drive way (by the way the car is one of my frustration points). The walk allowed me time to think, time to work out the hidden energy that is wiping me out day in and day out.

I find moments of peace moments of relaxation, not many, but I find them. In my small back yard I have a pond, often times I will sit out by the pond, listen to the water fall, and just let myself go. the pond gives me many hours of joy, just puttzing  around, cleaning it, feeding the fish and turtles, just allowing myself to be.

It is important that we find theses small moments in life, times were we allow the outside world to slip away, as long as we always come back to reality. Notice that I never stated I go to the bar to drink, or I sit by the pond with a case of beer or a bottle of bourbon. Yes I do like a cold beer every now and than, and a good glass of wine is always nice, but I do not use them as escapes from reality. I would rather use nature and or a good book.

My frustration levels will go down, I will start to feel a normality return to my life, once I figure out how I can once again control my life (yes I am a control freak). But until than I will use the little escapes I have discovered for myself, a good book, a nice walk, sitting by my pond or one of several others. Each allowing me just a moment of calm each taking my mind off the current situation, allowing my subconscious mind time to process all the @#@# going on in my life. And I know that one day soon (soon is a relative word) the world will be right once again.

Paul

6 Ways to Take a Mental Vacation

I got this is one of my email newsletters and thought I would pass it on…

-Paul

Sometimes you need to get away, but you don’t have the time or money. Don’t despair: A mental vacation can help reduce your stress.

By Diana Rodriguez

Medically reviewed by Lindsey Marcellin, MD, MPH

Small stressors can quickly add up to major stress and one big stressful event can send you reeling, with no idea of how to start addressing it. If you could just get away for a little stress relief, you know you would be okay. But too few of us have the time — or the money — to run off on an impromptu vacation.

Well, you don’t have to spend a dime or go anywhere other than a quiet spot nearby to take a mental vacation.

Stress Relief: Take Off on a Mental Vacation

If you don’t find a way to reduce stress, your health will pay the price, both mentally and physically. It’s not necessary to get a lengthy massage or head to a beach to relax — you can unwind every day in simple ways and still get a major benefit.

"People who are under a lot of stress have physical problems related to constantly being under stress," says Sally R. Connolly, a social worker and therapist at the Couples Clinic of Louisville in Louisville, Ky. "And if you don’t find ways [to relieve it], even in small periods of time, you can have long-term consequences." It’s crucial to add stress relief to your everyday routine, she says.

Connolly suggests learning techniques to reduce stress and trying to sneak in one or two each day. "Even if it’s five minutes in the morning and five minutes at night, just find time to do that," she says.

Stress Relief: Six Quick Mental Trips

Visualizing a stress-free place and other relaxation techniques are quick and easy ways to help your whole body calm down and give you just the boost you need to get on with your day. Connolly suggests these six ways for you to slip away on a mental vacation to reduce stress:

1. Read a book in bed. Connolly says this is a great escape and can leave you feeling refreshed, relaxed, and ready to face whatever is outside your bedroom door. Your bed is warm, cozy, comfortable, and a peaceful place for you. It feels luxurious, and getting lost in a good book is a perfect way to forget, then refocus, your own thoughts.
2. Visualize relaxation. Steal a few quiet moments to close your eyes and think of an image that relaxes you — such as the warm sun on your skin and the sound of the ocean, a big country field sprinkled with flowers, or a trickling stream. Connolly suggests thinking back to a time when you felt peaceful and relaxed, and focus on releasing the tension from your toes to your head.
3. Look at pictures from a happy time. Connolly recommends pulling out snapshots from a photo album of a family vacation or a fun dinner with friends. Reflect on your memories of that occasion, and what made it so enjoyable. Spend a few quiet moments reminiscing, and you’ll find yourself more relaxed.
4. Look out a window. Distract yourself by focusing on something other than what’s stressing you. Grab a steaming cup of coffee or tea, close the door, and take a mental break. Do a little people watching, appreciate any birds within view, or enjoy some fluffy clouds rolling by. Allow yourself to daydream for a few minutes.
5. Listen to a relaxation CD. Invest in a couple of these CDs for a short daily escape, says Connolly. You may like to hear chirping birds, rolling waves, or gentle rain — whatever your choice, closing your eyes and listening to these soothing sounds while doing some deep breathing can help you relax and de-stress.
6. Take a walk. Exercise is a great way to relieve stress because it’s a great escape for your mind. Head out for a quiet early morning walk or lace up your sneakers on your lunch break. Walking along a trail, waterfront, or other peaceful place when possible may offer even more relaxation.

Treat yourself to a 5-, 10-, or 20-minute mental vacation each day and train your body to relax and reduce stress — you’ll be amazed at how much better you feel after taking just a few luxurious moments all to yourself.