Posts Tagged ‘family’

waldo The next few weeks or months are going to be a time filled with great joy and sorrow. The joy comes from celebrating the graduation of my nephew from high school. He has lived with me for the past three years and I have seen him grow into a fine young man. Truth be told he is not my blood nephew but rather one that was created because of the love we have for each other. He is from Cameroon Africa and has been in America only four years, three of witch he has lived with me. So when I say I have seen him struggle and grow, I mean it. He spoke no English when he arrived and was thrown in to high school with the expectations of knowing all that was taught the past 8 years of American schooling. And when I say grow, well I also meaning both in his education and his size. Coming from a poor part of Cameroon he was a small child, but he made up for it fast! He ate like there might not be food the next day, because that was what he knew. It was an amazing time and still is, for him and for me. I have gained so much from the experience that i feel that I owe him a thanks. The is the joy I will experience over the next few months. The sorrow that will come is one that I am truly not looking forward to

My best friends name is Waldo, we have been friends for over 15 years, and have spent everyday together. Waldo is my dog but more importantly he is family. Waldo is a terrier mix, basically a mutt, he is a medium sized dog, about 55 pounds. So for his size he is old. Based on dog years he is about 100 years old, give or take. Up-until about two or three weeks ago he was basically healthy. I did have a scare about 18 months ago where I had to rush him into the vets for issues with his balance, it turned out to be an ear infection, but it still scarred me. The thought of no longer being part of my daily life is a thought that I do not cherish. But it is one I have to come to, his time is running out.

Last week I had to once again rush him to the vet. I arrived home about 9:30 one night to find Waldo spread eagle on the floor unable to stand or walk. He is now of a few meds and basically can walk. He has issues on slippery floors but on carpet he is mostly ok. I have hard wood floors through out the whole house with areas of rugs. So he has issues, I do what I can, I have placed rugs by his food and water and we, my nephew and I watch over him. But each day he seems to have new issues with his ability to stand or walk. Over all he is otherwise healthy, but old. This morning I was reminded of his issues, not that I have forgotten. When I woke up I gave him his breakfast and him meds that I mix in to his food with gravy or applesauce. Why he was eating I went to save and shower and get ready for work when I heard him crying. I found him spread eagle on the floor. The cry was one not of pain but more one of confusion and scared. It was a sound I never want to hear again, it was a sound of total desperation. When I ran to him He was looking at me for help and understanding and I at him with a look of fright and love. The thought of his passing is one that haunts my dreams and my waking hours.

This is the sadness that I will have to deal with over the next few weeks and months. Not to long-ago I lost my other dog, George, a few moths back. February 12 of 2010 George drowned in my back yard pond. And the memory is still vivid in my mind. The loss of a pet to some is nothing more than a loss of a pet, but to me it is a loss of a family member. George was eight years old when he drowned, so for eight years he depended on me and the feeling of failing him was over bearing. Waldo is 16 or 17 and has depended on me for 15 years. I saved him from the humane society days before he was to be put down. And in a way I have that feeling of letting him down because I can not protect him nor save him from what is to come.

I have loss both of my parents and a 23 year old nephew, so I know the pain of loss of loved ones. I would place the loss I feel for George to be on par as to the loss of my loved ones. The loss of Waldo will be felt deep within my heart and soul and my world will change forever just like it did with the loss of my father and than years latter my mother. The loss of any loved one is devastating at best. With the loss of my parents I have learned to celebrate the lives rather than morn the death. Yes I felt a profound emptiness and a deep sorrow that rocked my world. I cried and questioned God as to why He would take my parents at such a young age, but ultimate I celebrated the life they lived. I thanked God for the time we did have together and prayed for there souls. The same can be said for George, I cried and questioned and I cursed the pond that took his life. But in the end I thanked God for George and the happiness he brought to my life. I look at my pond with memories of George and how he loved to swim in it, chase the fish and turtles.

Waldo has and continues to bring me great joy. His personality is truly his and his love and devotion to me and the rest of my family is amazing. The joy he has brought into my life are too numerous to count and the idea of him no longer being their is to hard to phantom.

I know that God is with me, and that He will help me through the next few months of uncertainty. I also know that one day soon Waldo will no longer be waiting for me at the fence when I arrive home, he will no longer bark and anything that happens to pass by and he will no longer be at my side. God willing he will pass in his sleep with no pain, God willing I will be there for him when he needs me the most. And God willing I will be able to comfort him in his time of need.

The joy that my family and friends, including Waldo and George, have given me over the years have helped to create the person I am. With the passing of ones that are close to me I experience a great conversion of faith. I feel the hands of God upon my shoulders providing me the strength and comfort I need. I know the same will be true when Waldo is taken home. This knowledge does not make his passing any less painful, but it does help in the healing process. In Gods ultimate wisdom He knows the big plan for my life, and how each person and pet fits in to it. As for me, I am along for the ride, living my life to the best of my ability, taking each person and pet that comes into my life as a blessing knowing that one day, sooner or latter, they will be taken home. Some before me and others long after I have gone. It is a privilege for me to have had the past 15 years with Waldo, I feel honored to have taken care of him and to have him depend on me as much as I have depended on him.

The joys of sorrows of life are the ebb and flow of our existence, and it truly is a blessing to be experienced. The goodbyes are always hard but necessary, for every time there is a session, a session for joy and a session for sorrow. Soon I will be experiencing two passing’s, on of joy and one of sorrow, a graduation and a death, life is full of opposing forces.

Please pray for both my nephew and Waldo, that they may both my be blessed as they both experience a life changing event, one in to adulthood and one into the next world.

God Bless



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 “Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest”
Mark Twain

What a true statement, when we do the right thing people always seem amazed. The other day I was talking to my sister and we were talking about a family that took in my nephew. He had moved out to the DC area and knew no one except my other nephew, and in truth they really didn’t know each other all that well. But as the story goes, he met a young man that lived in the DC area and they became friends, his family took in my nephew and is treating him as their own son. As my sister and I were talking about it, she said that she just couldn’t believe that they would do that, that she was amazed that a family would invite someone they did not know in to their household.

I had to take a moment to remind her that we do the same thing, that currently I have a young man from Cameroon Africa living with me, whom I did not know just a little over a year ago. That she has accepted him as one of the family and we treat him as if he was my child. He is part of our family and has been ever since he moved in over a year ago.

But we did not see what we are doing as anything great because we are doing what we are suppose to do, the right thing. We live our lives according to the standards we were raised and to the faith that we are called to. It is nothing astonishing, nor is it a great thing, it is, just plain and simple, the right thing.

To me it is more astonishing that people don’t do the right thing that they chose to ignore the needs of others so they can fulfill their own needs. Both my sister and I are tight on cash, she is without a job and I am currently going through a bankruptcy, but neither of us would ever consider not taking care of this young man, nor would we turn away others in need. We would open our homes and pray that God will bless us with what we need to survive. And so far He has, whenever we get close to that breaking point, we seem to always find away to make it, something happens and we receive the money we need, or the help we want.

So once again Mark Twain has placed his finger on it, he has captured in a few words the human condition, one that is sad, but true, doing the right thing often times is seem as extraordinary and ordinary. The human condition is in need of repair, start today and do the right thing, and marvel all your family and friends, and don’t boast about it, let the action speak for itself!


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5 letters that can destroy a dream, one simple word that can wash away all your hopes, we say it all the time. We use it to brush people off, our kids our spouse work mates whom ever, it’s easy to say, and very effective.

The English language has offered us a word that will allow us to get out, postpone and even neglect our responsibilities. This word can shatter lives and create havoc and uncertainty in our loved ones. This word has power over others; it states nothing but everything all at the same time. And we use it to our advantage; we allow the word to carry away unwanted interruptions and inconveniences.

Can there be such a powerful word? Can one word really say all that? Can 5 simple letters truly shatter dreams and wash away hopes? Is there truly one word that can do all that?

We allow ourselves to be taken in by the words we use, we allow our hopes and dreams to ride on the wave of our words, and one word can, and often times, does wash away our dreams and dashes our hopes.

One work can have that much power. One word DOES…

Have you thought of the word yet? Maybe you need a little more time…. But maybe you don’t, maybe you already thought of it and maybe you’re just scared to say so, because maybe you got it wrong. But maybe you didn’t, maybe you got it right… You just never know, maybe you’re better off not even trying to figure it out.

Got it yet?

We use the word maybe to push aside tasks we don’t want to do, “Maybe I’ll clean the garage next weekend”

We use it do ignore our kids “Maybe I will play ball with you in a little bit”

To hold ourselves back “Maybe I’ll write the book some other time”

To keep God at a distance “Maybe I’ll start praying tomorrow night”

To pacify our spouses “Maybe we will go…”

Maybe this or maybe that, maybe now maybe never….

Maybe, 5 letters that can shatter dreams, what a powerful word…

Starting today take the word maybe out of your vocabulary, remove it, and never use it again, and just maybe you’ll see a change in yourself and others around you. (By the way, I used the word maybe there on purpose, as a joke, it should read, and you will see a change in your life)


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Trust, a simple work really, only 5 letters and the meaning is not to complex.  You trust in something or someone, you have faith that it will work or they will do as they say. Trust…


/Ponunciation http://cache.lexico.com/g/d/dictionary_questionbutton_default.gif[truhst] ,



reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.



confident expectation of something; hope.



·         belief

·         dependence

·         faith

·         reliance


On the surface it looks like a very basic thing, trust… But in truth we all know that it is a very complex thing and a very hard thing to do and to gain. Trust is a gift we give to each other and a gift we can take back very easily.

We go through life gaining and creating trust in others and things. We learn to trust our parents our schools and society. We are told to trust teachers, police officers and our Church. We are taught that trust is earned by our own actions. And we are taught we can break the trust others have in us the same way.  

Trust… Five letters that can control our actions and motives, some care about trust and others do not, some worry about gaining your trust and others are only concerned with breaking it.

Trust can build nations or tear them down, create families or tear them apart. Trust can start wars and bring peace. Trust is a word that has the power to lift you up, or hold you down. Trust is one mighty powerful word.

Trust is one of the most missed used and understood words in the English language, right behind Love. We state our trust in others and things with no value behind it, we give our trust to others who have done nothing to earn it, and we are appalled when that trust is miss used and abused.


Think about it, do you really understand the word…

Whom can you trust what can you trust in and do you really trust yourself?

Just something to think about…


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Can one be strong and weak at the same time? Can a person be over bearing and shy? Do we have the ability to be more than one self? Can we be many persons in one person?

Before I give you response, let me start off by saying I know people who act in such a way. They are a different person depending on who they are dealing with. Sometimes they are nice and understanding and other times they can be cold and harsh. It all depends on what is in it for them. The personality changes to benefit them and to please others around them. They may be shy if that is called for or strong if they see a chance to move in.

But are they truly two different personalities? Can one person really have 2 sides? I say no, is only one personality at play here. It is one of manipulation and control. It is a personality that centers on the self. It is one controlled by the EGO.

Now before everyone starts to yell at me, yes I do understand that we all act differently in different situations. We do what is necessary and called for at that particular time. That is not what I am talking about.

People know me; they know who I am and what I am like. When I meet people for the first time, they get an idea of whom and what I am. So if, for example, I meet someone for the first time at Church, they will see a more subdued me, but still me. So if that person sees me outside of Church they will not be shocked at what I am saying or doing. They understand me. The people above that I am referring to are not like this, they act in ways that are not true to themselves, they are manipulating the situation to cast the best light on themselves or to gather what they need. If the same person were to see them outside of the situation where they met they would not recognize them as who they knew.

We all know people like this, they feed off of others, they place the world and the entire universe around them, and they are the center. I have worked with them; they are in my family and are in my circle of friends. It is a frustrating relationship to have; the closer you are to them, the more you notice the many in the one. And the more you are expected to know who is who and when they will appear. Because once again, they are the center, you just revolve around them.

Their EGO’s are huge, and acts as there gravity force, keeping all inline and revolving around them, and any person that falls out of line, no longer revolves around them are sent off in too deep space or made to crash. That is until they decide they are needed once again.

So how do we deal with this, what are we to do with such a person? It has taken me years of learning to discover the answer to that question. I have read many books and as I have stated, I know many people who fit in to this, so my life experiences has taught me a lot, but I am a slow learner, and it has taken me many years to finally understand all that I have learned. So what is one to do with a situation like this, they are to leave it, get out of its gravitational pull.

Yep it’s that simple… Sort of…

I know that it’s not easy to leave a friendship or family member behind, but if you truly wish to make a better you, the key to a new you is to dust off all that is unhealthy for you. To leave behind anything that will pull you back. Read Dr. Wayne Dyer’s “The Power of Intention” to get a deeper understanding or even the Bible, Jesus himself walks away from unhealthiness. We must surround ourselves with positive energy, not and Egocentric energy, we must align with people and things that will make us better humans, more capable of creating change not only in ourselves but in the world around us.


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To each of us one day can be a thousand different things. Each gust of wind can move us in different and new directions; each flower we see will touch us in differently.  The world offers us different experiences, many ways to see the same thing, and many ways to live our life out.


A day of sunshine for me can be a day of rain for you, even thought we are in the same place, living the same weather. I am, of course, speaking metaphorically about the rain and sunshine, but not about how each of us experiences the same reality thousands of different ways.


We all have the ability to process information, we all have the ability to them use the information to help us determine our outlook on life, and how we react to or do not react to any one give situation. It’s our makeup how we are programmed or hard wired, what ever you want to call it, it is us.


Me, I see things mostly in a positive light, yes I know and understand that bad things happen, that at time life is crap, and yes I too can feel that way, and yes sometimes my outlook is not so positive, but I always try to put a spin on it, to make light of it, to have a laugh at my own expense about it.


Others see life only in darkness, no light shines through. They see no happiness in the world. I am sure that they too have days of light, just like I have days of darkness, but unlike me, they do not make light of it, or laugh at themselves, but rather they make it heavy, and fill it with dark matter and create a reality for themselves that fits their need.


We all do this, in one way on another, we all create the reality we need or want. We create a reality that fulfills our outlook, our destiny. We all have hear it said that we create our own destiny, and I believe this, I truly believe that God allows us to create our own destiny, and in doing so, we can create it how we see fit.


So I see it as sunshine, and others as rain, and some see it as partly cloudy, what every your weather pattern is, is what you choose it to be.


We all long for those sunny days in the summer, days we can spend outside with family and friends. We all need a little sun light in our days, to perk up our moods, to make us feel better about ourselves. We all need them, the sun gives us life. If this is true, then we also need to have the same outlook on how we view life, how we live our life out. We need to create sunshine where there is none.


The soft gentle wind of change will blow over you if you see life as sunny, the warm rays of love will softly caress you and the sounds of summer will fill your heart.


Your outlook is your destiny, see is bright and sunny or see it dark and gloomy; either way that is what you will get.


The Beatles said it best in the song “The End” :


“In the end the love you take is equal to the love you make”


We get back what we give, or in other words, we get back what we project out. If we see things as dark and gloomy that is what we will get in return, if we see them as sunny and warm, that too is what we will get back in return.


Life is ours to live, so live it fully, fill your days with sunshine and warmth, and in time you will get it in return.



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To whom do we owe thanks when we change, when we become anew? To ourselves, to our family and friends, to our community, church and word, to the person walking down the street, to the world or to God, to the higher power who created all?


To whom do we praise, to whom is all glory given for what we have accomplished?


Some will say to yourself, you did all the hard work, others will say to your family and friends, they had to put up with you and still some will say to the world, we are all part of the same life force, and some may say to God. And a few will say to all, and everything, to yourself, to the world your family and God, for each had a part in the change.


Nice sentiments all of them, but really only one response is correct, only one is truly a thank you.

Your thanks should go to God, for God allows us to choose freely who we are, he allows us to walk the path we wish, and allows us to create our own paths in the forest of life. God is your constant friend, even if you do not believe, or want him around, God is beside you, knows your heart and sees your destiny, to him we praise and thank.


Some may say, but wait I did all the hard work, I am the one who cried when a part of me died, I am the one who had to walk the thousand miles to get to the prize, I am the one who changed, grew and became a better person, why should I not thank myself and thank God.


Why only God? Why not others, like family and friends? Why not the stranger on the street and the community or Church? They all suffered through it with me, they all had something to do with my change, none of us live in a void, and we all are part of the global community… Once again all good questions, valid arguments each and everyone, but still in the end, when all the bills are paid and our leas on this earth is up, it is to God that we owe all, it is to God that we wish to go. So it makes sense that it is to God I give my praise and thanks. It is God who allowed me my freewill, not my family, nor my friends. The community did not give it to me, the stranger has no power to do so and the world is too concerned in herself to offer any to us.


Yet God not only offers us freewill, he demands it and gives it freely, God encourages us to change, to grow and to become anew. It is only God who gives freewill and it is only God who deserves my thanks.


Some may be offended, some may even feel slighted, family and friends may be put off, the community and church may feel used, but if the help was done in the true spirit of helping you, then they will care not if they are thanked, for they too should be thanking God for allowing them the freewill to offer help to you.


So I would like to say THANKS GOD for the gift of freewill… I pray I have used it only for your glory.



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