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Note: Cross posted from STATIC Youth’s Weblog.

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A monument dedicated to the unborn victims of ...

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In a soft voice, full of concern it was spoken. “This is my body”. It was spoken with a love that was felt by all and it lofted lightly in the air waiting for the soft breeze  to carry it away.

Note: Cross posted from STATIC Youth’s Weblog.

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Always forgive your enemies – nothing annoys them so much.

Oscar Wilde

Source: http://quotes4all.net/quote_578.html

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Forgiveness is a powerful act. The quote above takes a humorous look at it, but truth be told, forgiveness is powerful. And that is way it is most likely a very hard thing to do, to forgive does not come easy for most.  I know it does not for me.

But I have experienced it, and the power is overwhelming.If this is true, and it is, than why do we find it so hard to forgive?

the answer lies in our makeup, how we are created. We are created to survive. We will fight to save our lives and we will do what is necessary to advance our own personal worlds. Forgiveness flies in to the face of that. To forgive is to open yourself up to become vulnerable, if even for a split second. And all that we are fights against that sometimes till death.

It is easy to say the words “I forgive you” but difficult, at best, to truly mean them and to live them out. Often times we place conditions on forgiveness. We ask for something in return. This is not always wrong to do, but can lead to difficulties. The bible uses conditions when it comes to forgiveness:

Mat 6:12 (TEB) "Forgive us the wrongs that we have done, as we forgive the wrongs others have done us."

Luke 6:37 (NIV) "…Forgive, and you will be forgiven."

Mat 6:14-15 (NIV) "For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But, if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

I need to give forgiveness to receive forgiveness… It is a circle, I want to be forgiven before i forgive but I must forgive to be forgiven… around and around she goes….

Paul

Ilibagiza’s Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust (Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust by Immaculee Ilibagiza (Paperback – June 1, 2007))
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Broken?

Image by littledan77 via Flickr

The family dynamic is a very complex thing, it offers great joy and great sorrow. People have write songs and preformed plays concerning the family. Most TV shows are based on the family dynamic and certainly we have read many many books on the topic.

My family is no different, we have dynamics. We have out moments of great joy and great sorrows, and often times the co-exist. But at times one will override the other, the great sorrow of the loss of a parent or child will trump the great joy, becoming the dominate dynamic. Yet other times they seem to mingle and and the line between the joy and sorrow becomes fuzzy at best.

This gray area of the family dynamic seems to me to be the area were it sits the most. We seem to exist in a void of high and lows and allow ourselves to tread lightly on the soil of betweenness. Nothing wrong with that, for the most part. The great joys and great sorrows can be extremely taxing on ourselves and the over all dynamic of the family.

This is were I find myself, I am currently walking in the land of betweenness.

I feel no great joy or sadness within the dynamics of my family. Currently I am having “issues” with most of my family members. Not a good place to be… Some of the “issues” are of my doing and some are not, as is the case with most family dynamics. But what is different now is that I do not feel and great emotion over this riff. This saddens me in a way, but in other ways it does not. I am at a point in my life were the fight is not something I want to do. The battle field seems a long walk and I am not up to the walk to the battle field, nor the battle itself.

This fact bothers me, why am I willing to let the battle defeat me with out even a fight? Why am I willing to allow the dynamics of the family triumph over me? Family Dynamics are a powerful adversary to have.

To me, it seems that I have been beaten up for way to long, that I have allowed the family dynamics to control me and now I am just tired of it. I no longer want to be beaten up or controlled. I have bent to the will of others to keep the dynamic in a joyful mode and in doing so place myself in a field of regrets. I no longer want to walk in that field. I now want to walk in a field that I choose, be it joyful or not, it is my choice.

I am sure the family dynamic will mend itself, one day, but I do no that it will not be the same as it was. Each of us have changed and that change will affect the overall dynamic. The new family dynamic will still be filled with great joys and great sorrows but they will be defined a little differently now.

Paul

 

Complex Dynamics: Families and Friends
We are never deceived; we deceive ourselves.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Source: http://quotes4all.net/quote_1321.html

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Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater.

Albert Einstein

Source: http://quotes4all.net/quote_941.html

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Any one who has read my blog in the past knows I love Albert, and I love his wisdom. This is yet another great quote from Mr. Einstein.

He is not really talking about math here, but life in general. All to often we get hung up in the little issues of our daily lives, and fail to see the major issues of the people around us. Basically we sweat the small stuff and Albert is telling us not to. Good advice.

All to often we take the simple and make it complex, I think we do that to make ourselves feel better. This way we don’t have just basic issues but major ones. Almost like a status symbol “My issues are bigger than yours, so I must be more important”… How silly we humans can be…

In today’s world we need to simplify not complicated. Simplistic is better. The KISS method is needed, Keep It Simple Stupid…. Words to live by!

I have a habit of over simplifying everything, I break everything down to the simplistic and go from there. To me, if it is a fact at the simple level it’s a fact at the complex level. Lots of people don’t agree with me, but I figure they just like to complicate their lives.

Me, I like to live a simple life.. I’m not totally there yet, but I am working on it. Once again good old Albert has the solution, always consider that your issues are not as complicated, not as bad as someone else’s. As I always like to say “For the Grace of God go I”.

Paul

Dear Professor Einstein: Albert Einstein’s Letters to and from Children
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Are you like “Old Man River”? Do you believe in just floating along life’s water ways, allowing the current to carry you and the banks of the river to guide you?

Often we think that would be a good way to live, to just sit back and allow life to do its thing, and in truth, sometimes that is ok, sometimes the right thing to do is just that, nothing. But most of the time the “Old Man River” way of life is not what we need to be doing; sometimes the current of life is leading us in the wrong direction, carrying us in to troubled waters and grounding us on troublesome shores.

We need to navigate our ride down life’s river; we sometimes need to use the paddles we have made out of our hard work of change. Life will often toss us in to a raging river of turmoil and try to divert our destination, try to lead us in to the rocks of daily life. It is at times like this that we must learn to command “Old Man River” and tame it.

We are not just passengers on the boat of life, we are its captain, we command our destiny and we ride the rapids with determination and triumph over his waves, “Old Man River” is ours to command!

So when you get in to the boat today, stop to remind yourself that you are the captain of this ship, that you hold the utter and you will steer her will you will her to go. Your ship is under your command, and no one will take the helm from you unless you allow it. Her movements are at your hand and her destination is in your control.

“Old Man River” will not control you today, you will not allow it, and he is following your guidance and allowing you to pass over him in comfort and ease. “Old Man River” is tamed at least for today. As for tomorrow, well you’re the Captain of your ship, how will you steer her when the sun awakes is up to you…

Paul

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Time has the ability to change you, even if you do not want it to. We all grow and change over time, but some of us like to hold on to the past. Cling to it as a life preserver. We fight the change; we despise the growth and do all we can to stay in the past.

 

One would thing we do this because the past was a safer, kinder and gentler place, one where we feel protected. But it’s not always the case; some of us cling to the past, because it is known. Good bad or indifferent, we know what the past has to offer, we have lived it once, so we can live it over and over again, with no fear, and no growth.

 

Well as I stated in the start of this blog, growth happens to us regardless of what we want. So even though we think we are clinging to the past, in truth, we are just creating or present reality, we are living our lives in the present, using old and often times skewed memories of the past to help us navigate the present.

 

The human condition is set up to re-create moments that we store in our mind, to re-create them a little different. They are never truly as they happened, we may choose to spice them up a little, are add more smiles to them, or even make them worse then they truly where. It’s what we do; we skew images and memories to fit our needs and wants.

 

The human condition is set up that way, as a way of protecting us, and over time most of us will disregard memories that where truly unpleasant or on eventful, and only choose to keep the more happy and eventful moments. So often our “past” is just that “ours” and not truly the past.

 

When we choose to live the present in the past, for fear of facing the unknown, and choosing rather, to face the know of the past, we are living a life of created past. We are living a present that has never truly happened.

 

Each day is new, and each moment is special, each needs to be lived in the now, and not in the then.

 

So start today, and live it in the now, choose to feel the day as it is, and not as you think you did in the past.

 

Use the past the help you grow and chance, but do not use it as the now.

 

Paul

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Create the world you dream of lining in… We hear this all to often as a quick fix selling point to numerous talks and workshops, along with things like change your life in 30 seconds, or a better you in 10 days.

 

They all sound good and most really sound to good to be true, and they most likely are. Nothing happens over night, you did not become who you are over night, it took years of growing, positive or negative growth, but either way it was growing in some fashion.

 

Most of us probably bit a little bit of both, we grew positive and negative at the same time, the question is, what did we do the most? If we where equal in the negative and positive, then we would have experienced no growth, and I really don’t think that happens, ever, I think there is always a dominate one, one value that will be a tad bit stronger then the other, one condition that overrides the other.

 

Now the true question is what one governs your life, the positive or the negative? Are you ½ full or ½ empty, do you see everything as bad or as a good?

 

This question truly can transform your life, how you respond to everyday events, large or small will determine how you see you’re over all life. Do you see everything as a negative, if so, your life will always be a step back, or do you se life as a positive, a step forward?

 

In truth both will always exist in your life, there always times of darkness, times of negitiveness, but what is the overall condition, what do you allow in to your world the most?

 

By changing your view of event and action in your life, you will change your life, by seeing the positiveness in life; you will create positive responses and actions.

 

It’s a slow process, like any change, it takes time, and hard work, but it is a response you can train in yourself, a reaction that you can practice. You need to feel the positiveness in your being; you need to feel the growth in your soul. You need to own the energy that flows from the action of postiveness.

 

Look at life from fresh prospective, see things in a new light, and know that your actions play a direct roll in the outcome of the overall event. The outcome may be the same, but the reaction and growth will be a step in the right direction.

 

Creating the world you dream of does not mean the world will all go your way, but rather it allows you to live in the world and be effected by and effect the world in a positive way that allows not only you the ability to grow, but also offers that same ability to others that where effected by your reaction to the action.

 

Change is hard, it is a slow process, one that takes a lot of work, but the process is invigorating and can lead to great strides in your personal growth, but only if you see it in that light, only if you allow the positivenss of it to shape you and consume you.

 

Start today, and watch yourself being transformed in to the person you dream of being, living in the world you have created.

 

Paul

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